I guess it is high time I update you, blog readers.
I am a week or so late for my period.
Don't get too excited. For, this is not good news. I am NOT PREGNANT.
I know this because my doc ordered a blood test on Monday morning, and it came back negative.
I am sure, right about now, you are all asking yourself the very question that has been dancing around in my pretty head for the past few days...
Why am I late?
The answer is unknown.
Did I ovulate?
Also unknown.
Why, you ask?
Because I stopped using the devil CBEFM on CD 20 when I did not see a peak fertility reading. Because I took the advice of my doc. (who will be called Dr. JustRelax from here forward)
You see, I called Dr. JustRelax last month when my period came. I was a hot crying mess of a patient. And Dr. JustRelax told me to...you guessed it. Relax, get a bottle of wine, light some candles, and see how that worked.
And, me, being the asshole I am, I listened.
And do you know what?
I have no fucking clue what happened this cycle. Which is clearly a problem, since today is CD 37.
Allow me to share with you, internet, how this convo went down yesterday.
ps. yesterday was also Baby Rootbeer's EDD.
pps. I had a long post written about it, but deleted it. Because it was a ranting raving mess and you all wouldn't have wanted to read it anyway. TRUST.
OK, I digress.
So here it is, and I am warning you now, that I will spare no details.
Monday Morning...
Mrs. R: Oh Hi! I am a pateint of Dr. JustRelax's and I am calling because I am a week late for my monthly gift *insert eyeroll here* and I am not sure what's going on.
Lori (AKA the nicest receptionist ever): Oh hi Mrs. Rootbeer, let me just pull your chart.
Silence
Lori: OK well Dr. JustRelax isn't here today because Dr's don't come back to work the Monday after New Year's like the rest of the world. (OK maybe she really didn't say the last part, but I know that's what she meant. ) but I am going to have you go down to have blood drawn. Due to your history, it is important to know if you are in fact pregnant.
Mrs. R: Ok, I will go now then.
And off I went. Straight to the lab, where I proceeded to wait in the waiting room amongst 14 coughing old people. (I am not exaggerating)
After about 45 minutes of covering my mouth and nose for fear of swine, I was in the chair getting the blood drawn.
Tuesday Morning...
:phone rings:
Mrs. R: Hello?????
Lori: Hi Mrs. R it's Lori. I am calling to let you know your bloodwork came back negative.
Mrs. R: Thank you for calling. (and ruining my already horrible, most dreaded day of the year) So Lori, what should I do about the fact that I am still not bleeding?
Lori: Well, I will have to have Dr. JustRelax call you.
An hour later...
:phone rings:
Mrs. R: Holla
Dr. JustRelax: Hey Mrs. R , it's Dr. JustRelax.
Mrs. R: Oh hey, so I guess you got the results of my bloodwork?
Dr. JustRelax: Yes, yes I did. And how late are you?
Mrs R: about a week now
Dr. JustRelax: and that is unusual for you right?
Mrs. R: yes
Dr. JustRelax: OK well what do you want to do?
***at this moment my mind started reeling....what do I want to do? Is this man really asking me this? Should I tell him that I have seriously contemplated hiring elves to steal Mr. Rootbeer's semen in the middle of the night so that I can squirt it up my vadge with a turkey baster? Or that I have had suspicions about whether I have been ovulating for a few months now***
Mrs. R: Well, what are my options? (this was a better answer, no?)
Dr. JR: Well, you can relax and see if your period comes on its own or I can give you a pill to make it come.
*THIS IS WHERE PURE MAGIC HAPPENED PEOPLE. Something inside me snapped. I am sick of everybody's advice, including Dr. JustRelax. I am sick of floundering through TTC, I am sick of TTC period.*
Mrs. R: Here's what we are going to do. Let's wait a week and see if my period comes on its own, and I will call you next Tuesday if it does not.
Dr. JR: That seems reasonable.
Mrs. R: ok well now that we have that squared away, I am not sure I ovulated this cycle, and I have had suspicions about this for a while now...
Dr. JR: Well, don't you use that monitor?
Mrs. R: YOU TOLD ME TO JUST RELAX!
Dr. JR: ok well if you are not ovulating, I can make you ovulate.
Mrs. R: :chuckle: Oh really? How?
Dr. JR: with a pill called Clomid. I'm sure you've already read all about it? (translation: I know you are one of those annoying chicks who researches everything on the internet)
Mrs. R: Actually, Dr JustRelax, I don't know very much about Clomid. (translation: hahahahaha you're wrong because I haven't even read about clomid and now I am going to run over to the nearest computer and read all the info available and by the next time we talk I will be an expert on clomid but I haven't yet so youre wrong hahahaha)
Dr. JR: well, clomid is a mild fertility treatment, and it does have a few side effects, but the most promiment one is that it doubles your risk of having twins.
Mrs. R: Well, beggars can't be choosers, right?
Dr. JR: Let's get you a period and then you can come in and we can discuss the options you have.
:end scene:
So, there you have it folks, it looks like my blog will be taking a turn in a different direction in 2010.
Infertility.
Thoughts?
Ooooh, twinsies! yippee!
ReplyDeleteNot infertility, just assisted fertility :)
Good for Dr.JustRelax, better to take action than stand around and tell people to just relax.
I know some people who have had really good luck with clomid pretty quickly.
On that note, my last thought is this: since you may be getting things going in the baby(ies) direction sooner rather than later, enjoy the last of your non-pregnant/baby-free time. I know this sounds cookoo since all you want to be is a mommy (and you will be a great one!) but take it from me. Enjoy every breakfast date with the hubby, every movie in a real theater, every drink out with friends. This time is precious in it's own way, and time that you will never get back. (Until of course your kids are all grown up but then you will be old and wrinkled anyway and it just won't be the same ;-)
xoxo
I just linked to your blog for the first time and the "devil CBEFM" and "Dr. JustRelax" made me laugh, which is great, because 1/5 sucked for me too - it was the date of my 8wk sono. Now I'm sitting at home waiting to "naturally" miscarry. Ugh.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, about Clomid: maybe you will find this in your Google searches, but there is an alternative called letrozole (trade name Femara) that works a little differently & therefore does not have the negative side effects that Clomid does. I would suggest you look into that instead (it might be a bit more expensive, but not more than a box of those damn CBEFM strips!). Dr. JR might not suggest it b/c lots of docs just go for the old standby (Clomid). In any case... good luck. May you soon be able to pee without caring what time it is or what point in the month. Sigh.
Also... and I haven't read all through your archives, so this may be way out in left field... on an old post you said your average cycle was 26 days - what day do you ovulate? You may want to ask Dr. JR about testing your progesterone. My cycles averaged 25 days and w/ovulation @ d13/14, that made my luteal phase pretty short. I had to directly ask to get on progesterone and I got pregnant the first month I took it. Just a thought. (Of course that doesn't explain what's going on this month, but god knows we all have weird months!)
ReplyDeleteSFM - I'm so very sorry for your loss. I hope that you are able to find peace and comfort soon. Thanks for the clomid info. I will def ask Dr. JR about testing my progesterone. I am glad I was able to make you laugh. I hope I can make you laugh some more.
ReplyDelete~Mrs. R
Hey lady, it's your fellow CT'er checking to see how things were going. I'm sorry things are up in the air... of course the one cycle you didn't chart is the one cycle that gets all f'ed up. i hope stupid AF gets there soon so you can move on with the next cycle.
ReplyDeletekeep in touch!